You know those stupid, fattening, sweet, buttery muffins that parade around as breakfast but are really just dessert?
Well, sorry. That's what these are. I said I'm sorry!
Ok, but really� I'm not all that sorry. For starters, swimsuit season is over, my friends. Time to put on some extra weight to stay warm through the winter, right? And they do have whole wheat and apples, hello�that's healthy-ish. And also, my house smelled so amazing and warm and fall-y when I was making these, which is reason enough to whip up a batch.
Sidenote: have you seen the most obnoxious Gwyneth Paltrow food quotes? OMG. I love it so much. I just want to find ways to incorporate autumnal yum into my daily vocabulary. These muffins are a pretty good excuse�they're chock-full of autumnal yum.
Do you remember the apple muffins at Costco? I'm not talking about the ones they have now, with the streusel topping� I'm talking about the ones they used to have with the crunchy oat-crumble bottom. You guys, those muffins were awesome, as far as dessert muffins go. That's what I was going for here with the crispy oat bottom, but the muffins themselves are loosely based on the blueberry muffin recipe in the Grand Central Bakery Cookbook. I changed it up quite a bit. I mean, obviously I used apples (big hearty chunks of 'em) instead of berries, but I also used whole wheat flour and oats, and lots of warm fall spices. And butter. There's a good dose of the good stuff in here. You could definitely use coconut oil, but the butter makes these so good. For dessert, I mean. 
Apple Muffins with Crunchy Oat Bottom and Maple Cinnamon Glaze
Makes 24 standard sized muffins
I made some in paper liners and some directly in a greased muffin tin. The crunchy bottom seems to come out of both just fine, but either way, be sure to cool entirely before trying to remove, to avoid leaving behind delicious crumble.
Crumble bottom:
1.5 cups quick oats
1/2 cup butter (1 stick) melted
1/2 cup brown sugar
pinch of salt
Muffin batter:
2 cups whole wheat flour
1 cup quick oats
3/4 cup sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ginger
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon allspice
2 medium apples, diced (about 3 cups of apple chunks)
4 eggs
3/4 cup (1.5 sticks) unsalted butter, melted and slightly cooled
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup buttermilk (or 1 cup with 1 tablespoon lemon juice)
Glaze:
1 cup powdered sugar
1 tablespoon pure maple syrup
Juice from half a lemon
Dash of cinnamon
Preheat oven to 350. Lightly grease 24 muffin tins, or line with paper liners.
Make the crumble bottom: Stir all ingredients together until combined and set aside.
Make the batter:
In a large bowl, whisk together the flour through allspice, and stir in the apples until coated. Make a well in the center.
In a separate bowl, whisk together the eggs, vanilla, and melted butter, and pour into the well in the dry ingredients. Evenly pour the buttermilk around the outside ring of the dry ingredients.
With your hands, mix the dry and wet ingredients together, using big, slow circular scrapes. Be sure to incorporate the dry ingredients on the bottom of the bowl, but stop as soon as everything is incorporated. Don't over mix!
Bake: Fill each muffin tin with a small scoop of crumble, and pat down with your hands or the back of a spoon. The spoon muffin batter on top of crumble, filling tins about 3/4 of the way full. Bake for 35 minutes, or until golden brown and a toothpick poked in the center comes out clean.
Cool completely in the tin, then gently run a knife along the outside edge to release the muffins.
Mix together glaze ingredients (add more syrup if it's too stiff, or more sugar if it's too runny), and glaze cooled muffins.
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